The Diaries of Wendy Wensum Episode 47: The Genial Genie

I rubbed the magic lamp with a firm hand. In a flash a genie appeared hovering in the air.

‘I am the genie of all bridge players. Your wish is my command,’ he announced in deep majestic tones.

‘Come on, Genie, this is just a dream,’ I replied.

‘No, no, this is for real,’ he reassured me, ‘Name your wish, Wendy.’

‘Very well, I would like to be selected again for the Norfolk team,’ I demanded.

‘Now, now, Wendy, you have only one wish and my power is great. I suggest you choose something more general, more beneficial to the game worldwide.’

I considered this challenge carefully.

‘OK, I wish once and for all that married couples no longer bicker at the bridge table. That will be a wonderful legacy for all bridge players,’ I responded enthusiastically.

The genie thought for a moment before he spoke, ‘Your wish is granted; a place in the county team it is then.’

‘Wendy, stop day dreaming. We’re all waiting,’ ordered Millie, rousing me from my reverie aware that three pairs of eyes were upon me.

‘Play the spade from dummy, please,’ Millie continued, wrapping up our 3NT contract with an overtrick and an average score.

Being dummy can be really boring at times.

We were playing pot-hunters, Jon and Jane, in a trophy event at the Riverside.

This next board was rather more interesting.

I was South and opened 1♣️. Millie responded 1♦️ and I rebid 1♥️. Millie bid 2♥️. I considered both 3♥️ and 4♥️, but decided on game as the ♣️A seemed a useful card.

West	North	East	South
Jon	Millie	Jane	Wendy
			1♣️
Pass	1♦️	Pass	1♥️
Pass	2♥️	Pass	4♥️
All Pass

Jon led the ♠️3. I surveyed dummy and noted there appeared to be three losers, two hearts and the ♠️K.

Setting up the diamond suit seemed a possible option, but somehow I lost the plot during the play.

I won the first trick in hand with the ace and then ruffed a low spade in dummy. I returned to hand with the ♦️A and ruffed another low spade. This was followed by throwing two clubs on the ♦️K-Q. I came to hand with the ♣️A and, hoping spades were 4-4, I led the high king which held. I then played the ♣️10 which Jon attempted to win with the king, but to my surprise Jane was forced to trump. I had no idea until then that hearts were breaking 5-0.

She exited with another low trump, but the contract was made for a useful score.

The traveller showed mainly heart contracts with the odd 3NT also appearing. Whether my line of play was good or not, I really don’t know, but I certainly felt my friendly genie was on my side.

Making social conversation as we waited for the round to finish, I asked Jon if they were still doing jigsaw puzzles.

‘Oh yes,’ he replied enthusiastically, ‘At the moment we are tackling a 5000 piece whopper called Ripples on the Lake. It’s very exciting. We’ll continue with it when we get home.’

‘Lovely, no wonder you don’t have any …,’ Millie began but luckily the move was called and the rest of her observation was lost in the general hubbub.

In our local pub later, Kate and Jo instantly recalled the hand. It had been played in 4♥️ by North. Kate had led the singleton ♣️J which was ducked in dummy, allowing Jo to win with the king. She returned a club which Kate ruffed and the contract was defeated.

Millie turned to me, ‘Why didn’t you ask your genie to provide us with free drinks after bridge?’

I declined to answer, but mused that if the genie ever needed a new home, one of Millie’s many empty brandy bottles might serve the purpose.