Millie was definitely unhappy. She had been campaigning for years against the introduction of computer-generated boards at the Riverside. Now the wrangling was over and the committee had finally purchased the necessary equipment and software, and agreed to use computer hands for all future club events. Today’s teams competition was a momentous occasion the implementation of this controversial change. We were playing as usual with Kate and Jo as our teammates and during the first match this board appeared.
Dealer West Love All
West passed and I opened one diamond as North. East intervened with a pre-emptive three hearts, but Millie sitting South was undeterred and asked for aces with four no-trumps Blackwood. West made life difficult for us by attempting to sacrifice in five hearts. It was to no avail. I passed showing specifically an even number of aces. Millie interpreted my bid as two aces, and with no top losers jumped to the final contract of seven no-trumps, which was boldly doubled by West.
Auction
| West | North | East | South |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wendy | Millie | ||
| Pass | 1♦️ | 3♥️ | 4NT¹ |
| 5♥️ | Pass² | Pass | 7NT |
| Dbl | All Pass |
¹ Blackwood
² DOPE
The opening lead from West was the two of hearts, which Millie was forced to win in hand with the ace. She crossed to dummy with a spade and threw the losing spade in her hand on the ace of diamonds. With the club suit running, the contract rolled home with two spade tricks, one heart, one diamond and nine clubs.
“Perhaps computer hands aren’t so bad at all,” Millie noted with some satisfaction.
At the other table Kate was West and passed, as did North. Jo opened a pre-emptive three hearts. Not surprisingly, with nine clubs South came to life with a bid of five clubs. With a known eleven-card heart fit, Kate bid five hearts on the TNT principle. With North and South each holding two aces, neither felt confident enough to double.
In particular, South was aware that East might be void in clubs; North overlooked the fact that South must have a good hand to come in over a pre-empt. Five hearts by Jo sitting East was the final contract.
Auction
| West | North | East | South |
|---|---|---|---|
| Kate | Jo | ||
| Pass | Pass | 3♥️ | 5♣️ |
| 5♥️ | All Pass |
South led the ♣️A and continued with the ♣️K which was ruffed by Jo. Jo exited with the ♥️K of trumps taken perforce by South’s ♠️A. Unwilling to lead another club for a ruff and discard and unable to lead a diamond, South made the assumption that declarer was unlikely to hold the ♠️A for her three-heart opener.
She returned a spade won by North’s ♠️A. North, faced with the unenviable choice of returning either a spade or a diamond, led the ♦️A and the contract was eventually defeated by three tricks.
The IMP swing was decisive, allowing us to win the match comfortably. On this slender evidence from just one session of bridge, Millie announced that computer-generated boards were a splendid and much-needed innovation to the game. She could not understand why anyone could possibly oppose the committee’s excellent plan.
Accompanied by disco-dance movements she chanted, “Winner, winner, chicken dinner.”
She really should stop watching so many TV soaps. In spite of this apparent change of heart, I had the feeling that IT and Millie would come to blows again.
In the pub later, we discussed the board further and Jo commented, “One for your diary I think, Wendy.”
Looking at me rather uneasily but clearly surprised by this startling revelation, Millie responded,
“I didn’t know you kept a diary, Wendy. Whatever you do, don’t ever publish them. I wouldn’t want anyone to know about my dance routines or my colourful language.”
I assured her that all her secrets were safe with me.
